What makes one person strong and another person weak?

If you think about it, the concepts of strength and weakness are both highly subjective. Any action, decision or personality trait that seems weak to one person can be considered strong by another. Since there are a myriad of factors that contribute to our concepts of strength and weakness, they can be difficult for us to define and describe.

Further, a great portion of our lives is devoted to influencing the way we are perceived. To cultivate a certain image, we say and do things based on how we think others will view our decisions. Personally, I have always wanted to be perceived as someone with a level head on her shoulders. I want to be known as someone who is loyal, hard-working and trustworthy. I want others to think of me as honest, decisive and able to give quality advice.

Most of all, I want others to perceive me as being strong in all aspects of my life – spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically. When I think about my life so far, I have found that many of the decisions I have made, both consciously and unconsciously, are aligned with what I believe others will perceive as strength.

In my mind, one of the primary ways that I can been perceived as strong is by being able to control my emotions. I have never been an emotional person and my natural desire to suppress my emotions seems to align with my personality type.

According to the popular Meyers-Briggs personality test, I strongly identify with the ISTJ personality type. As the “Logistician”, one of the greatest weaknesses of an ISTJ that they are often insensitive to the emotional needs of others. Since I tend to suppress or reject my own emotions, it makes it difficult for me to consider the emotional needs of others. Further, people of this personality type tend to be legalistic, “by the book” and have a very direct communication style, all of which apply to me. As a result, I tend to rely on rational thought rather than emotion in my decision making.

For me, being able to control my emotions is one aspect of my personal definition of strength. Further, I think that being physically strong means knowing my physical limits and pushing beyond them (not to the point of injury, of course). For me as a Christian, being spiritually strong means making an effort to learn more about God and become more like Him every day. To be mentally strong means to cultivate positive thoughts and find healthy ways to work through negativity. Finally, to be emotionally strong means keeping calm under pressure and making it clear that others can depend on me. It means that others can trust me to keep my emotions in check and make rational decisions, regardless of the circumstances that I may face.

Sometimes, I find it difficult to live up to my own standards of strength. When I feel like I am falling short, I look to the Bible for wisdom. In his letters to the Corinthians, Paul describes the relationship between strength and weakness in a way that completely transforms my personal definition.

In 1 Corinthians 1:18-24, Paul explains that Jesus’ death on the cross seems foolish in the eyes of the world. He goes on to draw a distinction between the wisdom of humans and the wisdom of God, making it clear that God had a purpose for Jesus’ life, death and resurrection.

^“25 For the foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than human strength. ²⁶ Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. ²⁷ But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. ²⁸ God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, ²⁹ so that no one may boast before him. ³⁰ It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. ³¹ Therefore, as it is written: “Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.’” – 1 Cor. 1:25-31

In this passage, Paul makes it clear that human concepts of wisdom and strength are different than God’s concepts of wisdom and strength. Further, God is wiser and stronger than humans could ever conceive or experience in this life. In another counter intuitive concept, God seeks to restore honor in His world by elevating that which is lowly and despised. According to this passage, God has a purpose for people that this world sees as weak, incompetent, unworthy failures. These people become symbols of God’s strength, which is made perfect in their weaknesses.

I would be lying if I said that I was not one of these people – someone who is weak, incompetent and unworthy at their core. I like to think that I have achieved many worthy things in this life on my own strength, but this could not be further from the truth. In reality, I have achieved many worthy things in this life because of the power of Christ working in me.

So far in my life, I have had four different jobs, all of which I have felt highly unqualified for. Despite my fears of failure in my current role as a fundraiser, God has met me in my weaknesses and shortcomings. Figuring things out on my own has been no easy task – daily I am reminded of my weaknesses, flaws and failures. Ultimately, it is the strength of Christ that has gotten me through the hardest days. Not only does He give me strength to achieve more than I could on my own, but His strength never ceases to prevail in my weakness.

In his second letter to the Corinthians, Paul describes various trials he has faced in life and in 2 Corinthians 12:7, he calls them a “thorn in my flesh”. In the subsequent verses, Paul describes how God responds to his request for the removal of his trials:

 ^“9 But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. ¹⁰ That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.’” – 2 Cor. 12:9-10

Understanding this passage has always been difficult for me, since Paul’s concept seems counter intuitive. How is it possible for weakness to result in strength? In this passage, Paul recognizes that relying on his own strength will inevitably fail to deliver him from his trials.

Rather than seeing his weaknesses as faults or flaws in character, Paul sees his weaknesses as his greatest assets. Paul suggests that his weaknesses shine a spotlight on the miraculous ways that the power of Christ is working in his life. Not only do Paul’s weaknesses draw attention to Christ, he says that the power of Christ is made “perfect in weakness”. In the end, it is our weaknesses, not our strengths, that enable the power of Christ to prevail.

Over the years, transforming my definition of strength to align with the definition described in the Bible has been difficult for me. I continue to struggle to swallow my pride and engage with my emotions when I am faced with challenges. I find it hard and humbling to admit that relying solely on my own strength inevitably leads to failure rather than success. Beyond the strength that I can cultivate on my own, I have access to true strength through my relationship with God. By embracing my weaknesses and seeing them as assets rather than failures, I create spaces for the strength of Christ to be made evident in my life.

In the end, my strength is found not in the rejection of my weaknesses, but rather in my recognition and acceptance of their inherent value. When I am at the end of my rope – when I am burned out, defeated and broken – it is there I find true strength in the power of Christ, since His power is continually being made perfect in my weakness.